#writing that out definitely helped me think about it and put a narrative to it.

[montmorillionite]

I went to give public comment at my county's library board meeting this week. The library board was considering requests to ban books presented by a local far right group. They included Flamer, Genderqueer, All Boys Aren't Blue, Zenobia July, Looking for Alaska, and a couple others I don't remember.

The collections manager for the library system gave an excellent presentation on the laws and policies that govern collection management and also brought a copy of a Holocaust history book (I think it was Why The Germans, Why The Jews) in to show that it had been defaced with swastikas and antisemitic phrases and talk about the quiet censorship problem in our libraries.

The actual meeting itself lasted 5 hours, and the board chair refused to eject members of the far right faction who were disrupting the meeting and trying to pick fights. One of them even said "let's take this outside" to someone asking them to be quiet and let the meeting continue.

I'm pretty used to seeing and receiving hateful rhetoric and messages online. Comes with the territory of being an out trans woman online. But it felt different spending 5 hours in a room with people who are openly calling you a groomer and saying you're sexualizing kids. Who are trying to claim that the exclusion of queer people from public life is just "common sense" and "having community standards".

They also claimed that the director of the American Library Association wanted to turn all libraries in the country into transgender Marxist recruiting centers and because of the the local library system should cut ties with the ALA.

I guess I'm probably mostly writing this down to process it. It was a lot, and also a powerful reminder that the fascists are here. They're in our communities, they're trying (and at least here, partially succeeding) to control local politics. For me at least it's one thing to see it online. That feels at least a little removed. Seeing it in person was scary, but it feels good to have been part of resisting it and successfully opposing book bans locally.

[indierpgnewsletter]

The Tom Bloom Phenomenon and Sub-cultures Generally

For the first time ever (as far as I can tell anyway), there are 5 games in the top 10 of itch.io that are from the same creator.

Tom Bloom is an artist probably best known for his comic, Kill 6 Billion Demons. He’s also one-half of Massif Press and co-creator of the tactical mecha game, Lancer. And recently, he’s been publishing games under his own solo label, Chasm.

So far, under Chasm, he’s put out three products, which are all in the Top 4. Magnagothica: Maleghast is a miniatures war game without the miniatures. The assumption is that you’ll play it online using his stylish art. Cain is a dark investigation game where trained supersoldiers hunt down monsters created by trauma. And then there’s Games for Freaks, which is a little magazine that contains supplementary material for his other games.

As far as lineage goes, my understanding is that Bloom’s primary touchstone for narrative games is Blades in the Dark (oh, look, a new supplement is out). He tends to combine that with various degrees of crunchy combat, stunning art, shonen anime aesthetics, and angst. They sound interesting but I don’t know if I’ll ever get to play them. Lancer was definitely too rules-y for me.

I’m talking about this because I think it’s interesting that more and more, the huge diversity of RPG clusters are becoming apparent to me. This newsletter tries to take a wide view of the gaming scene but because I’m writing it, there’s a focus on storygames. There’s thriving groups and sub-groups that I almost never talk about – those around World of Darkness or GURPS or the 2d20 games from Modiphius or all the new Osprey Games or Jenna K Moran’s work or even solo games or larps or lyric games. And of course, there’s geographies and technologies and on on.

It’s not about the absolute number of the population of these various sub-groups – that’s not where their notability comes from. The point for me is that there is a huge diversity in the breadth of “who is playing tabletop RPGs”. There is a huge variation in what is considered approachable, fun, interesting, life-affirming, comforting, and so on. Anyone still talking about what games are or should be (without the requisite nuance) is just wasting their time.

We don’t all share the same context anymore. The games that you know aren’t the games I know. The way you play isn’t the way other people play. And this is a part of broader cultural trends – globalism, the rise and fall of mass culture, consumerism, monopolization – all of which I’m not smart enough to explain in 600 words. But it was also always the case – maybe it was just a little harder to see.

I think there are a lot of people who, like me, have a curiosity that exceeds their grasp. Thanks to Rascal, I get to do some spelunking into these communities. But I really can’t do them all. And I really shouldn’t. I’m excited for folks from all these groups to speak for themselves to others – to articulate their own contexts and speak passionately about what brings them together. That’s not easy honestly. It’s hard to talk about games without some critical language and some broader sense of the landscape and so on. But at the same time, we can figure that out along the way. I’d definitely like to help.

This first appeared on the Indie RPG Newsletter: https://ttrpg.in/2024/11/03/the-tom-bloom-phenomenon-and-sub-cultures-generally/

[lurkingshan]

hi there i hope you don't mind me asking for recs! this might be a bit too specific but do you know any (good) bls with age gap? i've only watched old fashion cupcake and minato's laundromat and i'd love to see more of that dynamic. have a good day!

Hi anon! I am delighted to talk about age gap bls with you. A few notes about how I define this:

I think of a true age gap romance as one where the narrative is at least in part driven by the age difference, not one where the characters are just incidentally different ages but it doesn't really matter to the story

The age gap needs to be significant enough that it puts the characters in different phases of life, so something like a college freshman dating a senior doesn't count

I also don't count supernatural stories where there's a massive age gap as a function of one of the characters being immortal, that's a totally different genre and narrative intent IMO

I will only include a show in this list if the age gap is between the main pair or a very significant side pair who has a lot of story time

So this means I would not be including shows like My Tooth Your Love or The New Employee where there is technically an age gap but everyone is adults and it doesn't really matter to the story. Or shows like Cutie Pie and Love in the Air, which do play with power dynamics somewhat based in age but where the actual gap is negligible and the story isn't about their age difference. Or something like Ossan's Love where there is an age gap pairing in contention but it's not actually the core romance of the story. Then there are shows where on paper there is an age gap between the main characters but the production cast actors the same age, so it never actually feels like an age gap story no matter how many times they write in dialogue trying to convince me that 28 year old is 40 (I love you dearly, Moonlight Chicken but please be serious).

So all that said, there are not as many proper age gap bls as you'd think! You'll note that this rec list is dominated by Japan and Taiwan, the absolute rulers of this trope. Productions in these countries love to dig into an uncomfortable taboo, and a true age gap romance fits nicely in that niche. Thailand doesn't play much in this space thanks to their branded pairs system that puts close-in-age actors together (and the couple times they tried large age gap romances were so terrible that I shan't speak of it). Korea has surprisingly done very little on this despite noona romance being one of the most popular kdrama subgenres. Where are all the hyung romances, I ask you??

With all that rambling out of the way, onto the list of age gap bls I recommend checking out.

History 2: Right or Wrong

An under appreciated entry in the HIStory franchise that pairs an overworked single father who is neglecting his parenting duties and the student he hires to help look after his kid.

History 3: Make Our Days Count

These two are technically a side couple, but they get near equal story time to the mains and they are an exemplar of a great age gap romance that gets the character dynamics exactly right to mitigate the uncomfortable power differential when one is an adult and the other is still growing up. My personal favorite age gap bl pair.

History 4: Close To You

This one's for the girls who like to tackle multiple taboos at once. Not only age gap, but also stepbrothers, with a bit of personality disorder thrown in for flare! And somehow with all that mess, they tell the story so well and make you believe. Do not @ me, I said what I said!

Kiseki: Dear to Me

I know many folks remember this show primarily for the side couple, but the mains actually have a very well done age gap romance between a gangster and a high school student he accidentally drags into hell with him. The plot of this show is absolutely not to be taken too seriously, just have fun and go with it!

Lovely Writer

The only Thai bl I think qualifies under the definition above and actually tells its story very well. This one is interesting because you get to see them both as kids and as adults and see how their age difference and its effect on their relationship shifts over time.

Minato's Laundromat

You already mentioned this one, anon, but I'm putting it on this list for posterity. A classic age gap bl with a romance between a repressed older man and the persistent teenager who worships him.

Mr. Mitsuya's Planned Feeding

Winner for most significant age gap in terms of years, this show is about a mid-20s editor who falls for a writer twice his age after meeting him on the job. So much glorious food and sexual tension.

Old Fashion Cupcake

Another one you've already seen going on the list for posterity. A workplace age gap romance with a younger man pursuing his mentor via foodie dates. One of the best Japanese BLs ever made, period.

The Pornographer

A maladjusted (to put it mildly!) man gets hit by a young student on a bicycle, and uses the situation to bring him into his home as a writing assistant. Things get pretty fucked up from there. This is one of my favorites and very under appreciated in part because you have to chase the story across two series, two shorts, and a movie to get the full narrative. Trust me, it's worth it!

[a-town-called-hometown]

yippee! apologies if my takes are horrendously bad

my personal take on the matter is that i definitely think the dark worlds can work as a metaphor for escapism without undermining the darkners' personhood. it can be more than one thing, yknow? the darkners are important, their lives matter. and the lightners do go to the dark world as an escape from the problems they face in their own life. but that's not the darkners' whole PURPOSE, yknow? i mean. according to the laws of the universe of deltarune yes darkners' "purpose" is to serve the lightners but like it's not their whole purpose in the STORY.

it's sort of like how, in UNDERTALE, LOVE represents how distant you've become, how easy it is for you to hurt people. but it also literally gives you the power to destroy the world.

i think the biggest reason i believe escapism is at least a part of deltarune's narrative is queen.

queen's whole speech in both of her fights is about how she intends to provide escapism for the lightners (so that they will worship her but also so that they will he happy). she wants to turn the whole world into a dark world, so that everyone can live in bliss and not have to worry about the woes of the light world. she mentions "Staring, Tapping, To Receive Joy. Staring, Tapping, To Avoid Pain." which is like pretty much the definition of escapism

she wants to help Noelle with the problems she faces in the light world ("Noelle. Who Will Be There To Help Her? Her Strange And Sad Searches" and "My One Idea To Help Noelle, Failed") by just... shoving it away for a blissful fantasy world ("Wake? No, She Has Already Awakened Too Much. Let Her Close Her Eyes And Sleep Away, Into A Darker, Darker Dream.")

...i forgot the rest of what i wanted to say!

well first off, thank you for your ask! I'm going to get extremely in depth in my answer, so bear with me here. sorry it took several weeks to write this. the escapism reading of deltarune is pretty deeply entrenched in fandom, and to refute it, I felt it required a full-length essay to completely explain my viewpoint.

yes, "the lightners desire escapism" does not automatically translate to that being the darkners' actual narrative purpose. escapism can be a theme without dehumanizing those who are used in order to escape - in fact, I've read a number of stories that use someone's desire to escape to HIGHLIGHT how they're hurting others in pursuit of that. I believe that toby fox is definitely capable of telling a story about kids having a valid desire to escape, and about them grappling with having inadvertently created a world of real, living people as a result.

(I'll reiterate again that this is not the story arc that generally shows up in fanon. the common consensus is that the game will end in an omori-esque "growing out of" the dark worlds. it's why I have a huge dislike of the fanon escapism reading, given that the darkners are shown as people whose lack of agency parallels kris' own. it would feel cheap if the resolution to that plot was that the darkners were actually never meant to be agents in their own fates. but this is a digression.)

the reason why i DON'T believe that this is a story that toby fox is telling is because of the way the world, themes, and characters are written. put simply, it just doesn't come across as congruent with the story being told.

deltarune's main themes are agency, fate, identity, and control. this is a conflict that shows up in nearly every major character, is baked into the worldbuilding, and is the central struggle involving us, the player. the protagonist of deltarune is literally possessed by us against their will. the darkners are objects that have no choice but to serve and be discarded. over and over again, there is emphasis on roles that characters play - and crucially, roles that are imposed on them.

what would escapism mean, in this thematic context? in real life, escapism can represent any number of things, but in a story, a major narrative theme generally has to dovetail with other major narrative themes in the work. I would argue that escapism in deltarune would likely mean going to a place where characters are able to choose for themselves what roles they embody, or even to discard the notion of roles altogether. a fantasy of control is the only way to escape a reality where you have no agency. and honestly, it's hard to imagine that something could count as an escapist fantasy if you don't even get to choose whether or not you participate in it.

let's talk about kris.

I see a lot of discussions around kris that say that kris goes into the dark worlds to escape. the dark worlds are posited as kris' fantasy of heroism. it's a world where they can seem heroic and cool, a world where they can have friends. this theory makes a decent amount of sense on the surface level, but only until you consider that kris is being controlled in order to go into the dark worlds. and it is not a control that they appear to welcome.

if those worlds represent kris' fantasy, then why don't they get to choose what happens in those fantasies? why are they being controlled by an external force, one that they actively push back against? if it's really an escape, then why does everything about this world reflect their lack of agency? if they really think this world is just a pure fantasy, then why do they care if spamton falls when his strings are cut?

because they're being deliberately obscured to the player, it is hard to say how kris actually feels about many subjects... but I do seriously doubt that they view the dark worlds as an escape. they don't act in a way that is consistent with that. they resist their lack of agency, and what little we do see of their reactions to darkner characters doesn't suggest that they view those characters as part of a disposable fantasy, either. they seem to have complicated feelings on ralsei. and of course, one of their biggest emotional reactions in the game is to the spamton fight. I would argue that that suggests they have empathy for spamton, which is a hard emotional reaction to have if you believe he's just part of a fantasy. not impossible, mind you, but it seems unlikely that kris believes that all this is simply fantasy.

also, considering that snowgrave both actively discredits the idea that the dark worlds are mere fantasy and is actively traumatic for kris... I seriously doubt they'd open another dark world in chapter 3 on a snowgrave run if their motive was purely to escape. on that route, they've seen the damage we can cause in a dark world. they know that berdly has sustained lasting damage due to our actions, assuming he's not outright dead. why would they want to try and "escape" to a place like that again now that they know what can happen?

the only answer is that they have a motive that isn't escapist.

now, as for ralsei... what part does he have to play in all this?

ralsei does play a lot to the fun, fantastical elements of the dark worlds. he delivers the prophecy that kickstarts the adventure. he flatters both kris and susie endlessly when they act appropriately heroic. he welcomes them into the castle and even makes nice rooms for them. he initially seems tailor-made to enable a fantastical experience where no real issues can ever complicate anything, and where the pain of reality can successfully be hidden from. but there's a lot of complications to the idea that he might represent an escapist fantasy.

the first, and what honestly seems the most important to me, is that he doesn't encourage kris and susie to remain in the dark worlds. he is welcoming and kind, but once the adventure is over, he prompts them to return to the light world. he wants them to deal with their more "real" problems like homework. that doesn't feel like he is trying to facilitate escapism in them. a real fantasy would encourage you to stay in it, wouldn't it?

and while ralsei is definitely invested in making sure the lightners are happy, there are always cracks that show. he isn't able to make kris ignore what happened in the spamton fight. he isn't able to convince susie to be peaceful and kind. and in his very essence, he represents a number of uncomfortable ideas. very importantly, he represents a number of uncomfortable ideas to kris.

this probably ain't your first fandom rodeo, so I'm not going to explain all the different ways that ralsei interacts with kris' personal issues. there's plenty of posts on it out there. what i will point out is, once again, it feels odd that a character who seems tailor made to bring up kris' most uncomfortable associations with their lack of agency and their outsider status in their own family would be part of a fantasy of escapism to them. you'd think that they'd prefer something that didn't have an inbuilt hierarchy, a prophecy that denied them autonomy, or especially a person that reminded them how little they fit into hometown.

that doesn't mean kris doesn't care about him at all - it seems very likely that they do. what I mean to say here is that he just seems ill-suited to an escapism reading, both behaviorally and on a conceptual level. it doesn't seem like that's at all part of his servitude towards the lightners.

of course, there is another non-lightner entity that ralsei seems diegetically engineered to serve. but I'll discuss that later.

now as for susie...

yes, susie definitely views the dark worlds as more fun than the light world. and why wouldn't she? the light world sucks for her, and she doesn't seem very aware of the fact that the dark world can also suck. you could definitely make the argument that she views the dark worlds as a fantastical escape from reality... were it not for the fact that she treats her darkner friends with just as much importance as she does kris and noelle.

can someone treat components of an escapist fantasy as real and important? of course. but given deltarune's themes of agency and control, as well as the fact that darkners exist in servitude to the lightners, I feel like you'd have to make escapism tie into forcing others into a lack of agency if you wanted the theme to feel coherent with the rest of the work. this would require susie to be limiting the agency of the darkners around her. and obviously, she doesn't do that. her presence around them might be inherently limiting, just by simple virtue of being a lightner, but she isn't aware of it, and clearly is uncomfortable with the idea of limiting anyone's agency. she encourages ralsei to make choices. and she supports lancer in basically anything he wants to do. her treatment of lancer is integral to chapter 1's narrative, and it seems like that treatment of ralsei is integral to the ongoing narrative as well!

her preference for the dark world feels very rooted in her engagement with it as its own reality. rather than trying to avoid her real-life problems by engaging in a pretense, she seems to simply want to spend time with her friends in a place that isn't cruel to her. she isn't ignoring any of the dark world's problems in service of that, either. she notices when things don't line up. if she thought of it as a fantasy, wouldn't she be inclined to ignore issues that impede the fantasy?

and critically - like kris, she does not intentionally choose her imposed role in the prophecy at first. she steps into the role of bad guy to resist it, but that role is limiting too, and she eventually acquiesces to being a hero. it's never something she's completely on board with, though. she actively pushes back the limitations that the role places on her. I find this important to reiterate when we are discussing the notion of the characters viewing the dark worlds as fantasy.

noelle has a complicated relationship to the dark worlds. susie tells her that it's a dream to make her accept the strange reality she finds herself in, which works well on her. she continues to think of it as a strange dream throughout the chapter. (though, like the others, it is not a 'dream' she entered of her own volition!)

it is also a markedly unpleasant 'dream' at times. she has her agency restricted, is kidnapped, has to evade a controlling monarch, and is even tied up in a weird evangelion cross thing on the hand of a giant robot. it's not purely fun. noelle does like scary things, and while it might be healthy for her to have an experience where she stands up to a controlling adult figure... again, the circumstances make it difficult for me to assume that this is a fantasy she would choose for herself. not impossible, mind you, but it's not the first reading of the situation that comes to mind.

and while she does say she wishes she could dream like this every day in the normal route, that does happen specifically because she was talking to the girl she likes. it makes sense she'd find that pleasant. I don't think that necessarily equates to her finding the dark worlds escapist.

and importantly, this isn't the sentiment that she expresses in every route.

again, there's a lot of analysis on snowgrave, so I won't bother regurgitating it much here. but it's nightmarish for both kris and noelle, and very likely fatal for berdly. noelle needs to believe that the event is a dream, for her own psychological safety, but one of the most important parts of snowgrave...

...is that its events, and the world it took place in, are very, very real.

noelle wants to have the strength to face her problems, both in the regular route and in the snowgrave route. rather than escaping from them, she views the "dream" as a chance to practice dealing with her day-to-day issues. it's just that in the regular route she finds that strength authentically, and in the snowgrave route, that desire is manipulated and pushed until she is forced to kill berdly. she doesn't interpret snowgrave as an escape gone wrong. she views it as a dream that became a nightmare. and those are two extremely different things.

but i haven't even gotten to the biggest thing that undermines the concept that the dark worlds are a metaphor for escapism! which is: this fucking guy is dead wrong about everything.

so full disclaimer - I really love berdly. I think he's slept on a lot in the fandom because he's annoying and weird. which is fair, I suppose, but I think ignoring him hinders a lot of people's understanding of deltarune's overall narrative. because berdly often illustrates a lot of concepts in the game, but his narrative framing as a joke (usually...) prevents the player from taking it completely seriously. he has things to say and ideas to show off, it's just that he's often very loud and kind of dumb in his expression of them. which is kind of the point!

ralsei brings up the idea that the darkners are meant to serve the lightners very seriously in chapter one. by extension, and by way of the literal mechanics involved in a dark world's creation, we can infer that this logic is probably something that also applies to the dark worlds themselves. they are allegedly worlds and characters that only are supposed to fulfill a dream of the lightners. but due to narrative framing and deltarune's themes, we know that that's not the full truth. however dark worlds and darkners are created, they deserve to have their own agency. they can't just exist to fulfill a higher being's wishes.

you know who else undermines that view of the dark worlds? berdly! berdly does!!!!

because berdly is the only lightner in the game so far who does take the dark worlds to be an escapist adventure! he wants to turn cyber world into smartopia. he views this as a chance to be a cool hero. he believes he's going to get the girl, he's going to shape this world to his own liking, and maybe also he's going to get queen to acknowledge him or something so he stops being a forgettable little bluebird. and not only does none of this happen, his steadfast belief that it will happen is continually a joke within the narrative!!

berdly's wishes for uncomplicated escapist fantasy are flat-out denied by the dark worlds themselves. as a lightner, those worlds should be serving him. he should have the power to do whatever he wants within the bounds of an escapist fantasy. these npcs should be singing his praises!

but he doesn't have the power. and this world doesn't sing his praise. because it just isn't an escapist fantasy. he isn't right to view it that way. his wishes for heroism are always going to be thwarted.

so now that I've gotten all that out of the way, let's swing back over to the subject of your original ask. queen.

because, like berdly, queen's entire character arc is about how she's completely wrong about what the lightners actually want.

queen would in fact like nothing more to place the lightners into an escapist fantasy. she believes that that's the best way to serve them and make them happy forever. as a darkner, queen has very much internalized the idea that a lack of control is what actually makes people happy. since darkners have no choice in their destinies and are supposed to be happy in it, and since she personally finds her role as a darkner fulfilling, she believes that that's true of all people everywhere. if you want to make people happy, you just have to remove that pesky personal agency!

so she spends the story trying to force the lightners and particularly noelle into situations where she controls them in order to make them ostensibly happier. she does genuinely believe that this is the right thing to do, but as she finds out eventually, she's just wrong. noelle doesn't want that. queen believes that escapism is why the lightners use the internet... but that's totally wrong too.

while there are other searches mixed in, noelle is trying to use the internet to find her sister. instead of trying to hide from whatever happened, noelle wants to figure it out. queen's thesis about noelle and the lightners is proven wrong even before she personally encounters noelle in the dark world. it's just that queen doesn't realize it due to her limited perspective.

the concept of escapism being brought up with both queen and berdly is not there to say that the dark world is escapist. rather, it's there to say that it isn't. despite the dark worlds being a fantastical place, they are extremely real. to view them as a means of escape is foolhardy at best. you cannot act as though you are above consequences within them.

themes and ideas exist within the story for a sake of an audience. so let's get into the final character I need to discuss here. hopefully this will tie my thesis of deltarune together neatly.

that character is of course us. the player.

when creating a piece of fiction, an astute author will often identify and anticipate an audience's reactions to certain things in their work, and write things in such a way that they elicit the desired reactions. in essence, a writer is directing the "character" of the audience. how we feel and how we are anticipated to react to things is an integral part of nearly every fiction.

that effect is far more overt when dealing with metanarrative fiction that diegetically involves the audience. since the fiction is saying a lot of things about the general 'you,' the audience in aggregate, your reactions to certain things in the story have to be finely cued and anticipated by the author, so that the author can thus commentate on the reactions that you have to the story. the "character" you are assumed to inhabit is posited by the author to have certain traits.

to explain what I mean in plainer terms, I'll use the player of undertale's no mercy route as an example. because undertale is commenting on the way rpgs generally work. the player's behaviors in no mercy are attributed by characters in the story to be the result of us acting like a typical gamer. we kill the characters in the game because we want exp. and more than that, it's because we want to see everything the game has to offer. the role we inhabit in this role-playing game is that of a completionist. you could say that that's assumed to be our "character" in no mercy.

deltarune also posits that certain things are true of its audience. by being written to evoke certain cultural ideas, rpg tropes, and references to undertale, it guarantees that its audience will probably have certain traits, and spends a large amount of its conceptual focus commenting on those traits. one of those traits is nostalgia, which is probably an idea that I'll expound upon in a further essay because it's quite integral to my reading of deltarune. but the main one I mean to discuss here, and why I went off on this tangent about how audiences are dealt with in metafiction, is that we are posited as someone who believes in the logic of certain narratives.

deltarune's writing evokes a lot of portal fantasy narratives. alice in wonderland, narnia, pretty much every story where it's revealed at the end to be all a dream... the story of deltarune superficially resembles a lot of those. this, I think, is responsible for the popularity of the escapism theory. because those stories are often at their end about a child learning to put away fantasy and grow up, people tend to believe that deltarune must be about the same thing. but I truly don't think that deltarune is trying to do anything with that aspect of portal fantasy narratives, at least not directly. its main characters aren't involved in that exact type of coming-of-age arc.

instead, deltarune is very concerned with what happens to characters in fantasy, and specifically fantasy rpgs. if your world is deemed to not matter because it's a dream, what does that mean for you, who has no choice but to live in it? if you are an npc whose role has been predetermined for you via script, then can you ever decide for yourself what you want? what if you want to matter? what if you want to be your own person?

as the major controlling force of deltarune, we are initially cued to believe that deltarune is like a dream. it superficially fulfills so much of what we want from undertale fanon. hometown seems like it's a perfect idyllic town, at least until you start noticing the obvious cracks. and remember what I said about ralsei earlier? he is so reminiscent of asriel, and extremely eager to help us. it's not a stretch to say that making us specifically view deltarune as dreamlike and idyllic is probably part of his purpose in the game.

I would not say that we are posited as escapist. but the idea of escapism as brought up with queen and berdly is meant to strike at the heart of a much deeper idea that deltarune is trying to deconstruct. because if we view deltarune as a dream, escapist or otherwise, then we are inclined to write the internal realities of the characters inside off. the dark world can disappear without it mattering. we can control kris without it mattering. if it's all a dream, what does it matter? why should we care to let its characters go free? aren't we supposed to be in control?

if deltarune is an rpg... what is the significance of us interacting with it?

[cochineal-leviat]

Sweet Dreams, Stardust

Okay, so I have a lot of feelings about In Stars and Time. But let me say first, wow, this game irreversibly changed my brain network. For anyone who is considering buying this game, please do. I don't think I've had a story touch my heart and mind like this for a long time. And that goes without mentioning the stunning visuals and entertaining battle system. (Be careful, though, because this game handles heavy topics regarding mental health)

If you're still hung up on buying it but are curious, there is a free demo on Steam if you like to try.

Thank you, @insertdisc5, for this gem of a game. I will be turning it around in my head like a microwaveable gourmet meal for months to come.

Technically the illustration has no spoilers (unless you count Siffrin having a good nap as a spoiler). But I will be going into heavy spoiler territory under the keep reading since I need to get my thoughts on this game off my chest.

And a monochrome version because you know me, I can't help myself. Even in black and white art pieces, I will put in some colour.

And a very tiny Loop

Initially, I was going to do a piece with a theatre stage and the cast (Siffrin, Mirabelle, Isabeau, Odile, Bonnie and the head house maiden) taking a bow and finally leaving the spectacle to a life not controlled by a script and Wish Craft. But it was more fitting to put my feelings into creating a peaceful scene. Like, oof, I needed this very badly. I used sepia to make the painting warmer and added some more details like headcanons. The stars/colours might be remnants of Siffrin's transformation. Or maybe they were always there, but he never paid attention to it. Who knows.

I'm going to keep this brief. Otherwise, this post will take way too long.

I adore Siff's character. It's perfect for a game and narrative such as this. I saw a post not long ago on Tumblr going into depth about how their role as the rogue and not the hero works so well, so I won't linger on it for long. But how they would rather listen and fade into the background perfectly aligns with the player's experience of being the silent observer. (And the nodding off that changes into zoning out. It took me way too long to realise that small but essential narrative change) Oh, and the portrait change! It flew over my head until I was staring at the game menu. I was so confident Siffrin had a mischievous grin and not a frown. I always feel slightly surprised when the party asks for Siff's opinion or mentions that they have been too quiet. I felt Siffrin's excitement like my own when he got excited at finding clues to end the nightmare they were in. So I knew it would end up falling on their face because they were too excited. I just had this bad gut feeling the whole time during Act 4.

And oh boy, speaking off acts. I thought it would have been the standard 3. Boy, I was wrong. Whenever I felt I was nearing the end, I was thrown back at the start with more mysteries than answers. It made exploring the game intriguing since there is almost no information about it online (at the time of writing this post). There is the Discord, but I didn't know about it until I finished it.

This game has a lot of secrets, and I had a lot of fun uncovering them. The looping mechanic works so well in discovering little details and further leads. (even though my stubborn arse kept trying to do everything in the least amount of loops as possible. I thought the ending would be different if I exceeded a 100. My final number is 59. I am still not sure if I should be mad about it not being a rounded number like 60 or that I went over the 50 threshold)

However, it is a good thing that only some mysteries were solved. Like, what's up with colours in this world? Everyone sees in black and white, and the idea of shades and colours is only spoken of in scientific studies. They do exist and are not a part of the disaster that happened to Siffrin and their land. But there is definitely something mysterious about it. I adore how the dialogue reflects this, as the characters do not speak of shades or colours. Isabeau expresses surprise to see a streak of red colouring the sky in Act 6. It makes you think about how colour is perceived and how you describe it. (The lore inside this game is immaculate. I eat this shit up)

We never find out the name of the country north of Vanguard or what it was like. We can only infer that the beaches had black sand, with shells that shine like stars, high-reaching mountains, forests and plains. Which is vague and yet intriguing enough to make you wonder. It connected me to Siff and King because I also wanted to know. I was desperate to know. I needed to know. But in the end, we never will know because that is not the story's point. Siffrin even says in the game, that King should let go because he is hurting everyone and everything, including himself, in his desperation to preserve Vanguard. This is all the more ironic when Siff accidentally does the same with his family and the loops. I might gush more about what the country might be like and their technology in another post. This game makes me want to theorise. This is the first time I've wanted to write and post theories. ISAT fucked me up good.

Which, by the way, was genius. Siffrin and King are mirrors of each other. Siff does not have King's disastrous ambition, but their love/obsession will be the downfall of both of them. They have more than being each other's countrymen in common, and I imagine Siff despises that.

I love the fact King's question to Siffrin before the showdown was/could never be answered. Usually, in a game such as this, you must figure out how to solve everything, especially for the big bad. But that was never the goal. King is a delusional monster who will not stop before achieving his dream. He will raze everything to the ground and hurt many people because he must succeed. It is what he desires. Nay, the universe wills it. What a witless excuse that can easily be made into someone's truth. Especially to somebody who is driven mad with grief.

How King's character's done is so excellent. Because, at first, I wasn't scared of him at all. He was just the big bad, and I felt nothing much but the glory of victory when Siffrin outsmarted him by looping and making sure Mirabelle learned the shield spell that would protect the party from freezing in time. But each time you fight him, you get more frustrated until Siff figures that talking to him might be fruitful. It does, but unfortunately, you and Siffrin leave yourself emotionally and mentally vulnerable. King stops being a one-dimensional villain and changes into an actual person. Someone you can sympathise with and possibly mend peace with without fighting. You and Siffrin opened his heart for a kindred spirit and got hurt.

King stopped being a monster and became human. And while monsters are wretched, humans have intent behind their cruelty. I felt so betrayed, so angry, but most of all - terrified. I felt it when Siffrin spiralled when fighting King again after their actions caused such a catastrophic turn of events for Bonnie. Every time after that, the fight with King felt tense and nerve-wracking in a dreadful way. Because even victory could not soothe the dread I felt. (The track 'It's finally over" will forever haunt me. I already feel anxious whenever it cycles to that when I listen to the playlist)

He was not, however, the final villain, even though everything that happened was King's fault. You were always your greatest enemy (or Siffrin in this case, since you are supposed to be Siffrin). I never could have guessed that the whole reason why Siffrin could not escape the loops was because Siff accidentally wished to never let go of their friends. This reminds me of Modaka Magica, where (spoilers for the OG anime) Homura goes back in time so much that the universe ties itself around Modoka, making her a waiting egg whose wish and magic will be massive when she becomes a magical girl. The one thing Homura was trying to prevent.

(Siffrin and Homura are identical in that sense. Shy characters who are loyal to a fault but are rendered into something cold, bitter and cutting by their traumatic experiences. Only Siff has people who care about them and would do anything to save him, too, whereas Homura never lets go, making the world a worse place to live in. Yes, I did go into doomed Yuri. That anime lived in my mind rent-free in my mind for years)

The Head House-maiden not being the villain was also a great touch. I am used to the apparent antagonist turning out not to be the big bad and the trusted, friendly character ending up being the evil one. Twist villains no longer work when everyone expects them to be villains.

That was my biggest theory as I played. The second biggest being that Loop is someone who enjoys Siffrin's suffering. I am so glad that was also not the case. They are apathetic but not cruel. Never intentionally, anyway. They were like the player, urging Siffrin to go deeper into the mystery to solve it. Ultimately, I chose and made cold and cruel decisions simply because I wanted to see what would happen. So yeah, I warmed up to this cosmic star thing as the game went on and even started trusting them. Act 5 really is a punch in the gut. I am so sorry, Loop. Thank you for coming through in the end.

Oh man, this is so long, and I haven't even gone into the main cast. I will leave that for another post. They are such great characters, as are the people of Dormant and the House. (Don't think I don't see the wordplay in this game. Very clever)

Going into this game completely blind was the best experience I could have had. I felt anxious, happy and scared so severely that my neurons were rearranged. I don't know if there are more endings (aside from the obvious action of attacking Odile in the True(?) ending of the game), but I am taking a break from it to make art and write for this game before I dive back into despair-o-land.

Anywho, thank you for coming this far and reading my ramblings. Have a fantastic day or evening further! o(*'▽`*)ブ

[mayabruhbruh]

What do you think of the possibility of Will and Chance happening? I feel like it would be really poor writing tbh but I feel like they will give Will a different love interest because they’ll try to make all of the audience „happy“ But that would just truly not align with the writing so far I feel like.

Love your analyses btw<3

THANK YOUU! That's so kind :) And great ask! This is definitely a topic that the ST fandom needs to discuss.

The default question when people have little to no hope in Byler is, well, who the hell is Will going to end up with? Because it’s become increasingly evident that they’re trying to set him up for a romance. The “im not gonna fall in love”, the “it’s not my fault you don’t like girls”, even the gif shown above. It all can be interpreted to mean that Will is going to find his person soon.

So... to be completely honest, I had no idea who Chance was until this ask popped up and I had to look him up💀. It’s been a while since I’ve been on here, so I’m a little rusty on the deep lore lmao. So, in the off chance that others might also be confused, here’s a (rare) gif of him I found.

I think that’s him with the Hawkins cap on the right. Correct me if I’m wrong.

I’m not sure where the rumors that this guy was going to become a bigger part of the show came from, but that seems highly unlikely to me. I feel like they would have either hinted at it in the fourth season (like how they’re giving Patrick here quite a sizeable role so that he’ll be memorable to us later when he gets vecnafied) or they would have announced him as a more prominent character already like how they did for s5 with Holly, that one new kid character, and also how they did Amybeth for s4. Idk, maybe it’s unreasonable to think they would have to do that, but it feels quite too out-of-the-blue. Especially for a character that would take on the role of becoming our central character’s love interest, which is a BIG DEAL. Especially if it’s queer lol.

Secondly, I firmly believe that it would be a disservice to Will’s own desires to meet someone new.

Will said this explicitly in the van scene, and as of now, we’re still under the impression that Mike is his person. Forget about Mike’s issues and feelings for a second, and think about what Will is saying here. He feels like a mistake for being different, but Mike makes him feel like he’s not a mistake at all, that he’s better for being different. Mike gives him courage to fight on. Fuck. Tbh, it makes me wonder how long he’d felt this way. As a byler, you might be inclined to think his feelings have been on for forever, but narratively, he could have easily just realized his own feelings very recently, most likely sometime between season 3 and 4. It doesn’t mean the feelings weren’t there before, but realistically neither Will nor the general audience were aware of it before now.

Moving on.

Has anyone heard of the rule of Chekhov’s gun? It’s an incredibly clever and widely-used tool in screenwriting and storytelling in general that helps to clue the watchers in for what’s to come next.

Think of Lucas’ wrist rocket in season 1. When they introduced it as a flimsy-looking, no-good weapon that he’d put too much pride in at first, it gives us a good laugh and we move on. But really, it very meticulously set us up to subconsciously anticipate to see it again later. That’s what Chekhov’s gun is all about. Set-ups, foreshadowing, hidden treasures.

Another great example would be the painting reveal of s4. Obviously, after finding out that Will was painting something, bylers immediately figured it was for Mike and BEGGED and HOPED and PLEADED that we’d be able to finally see it, but to the general audience it was just another something that they’d have to pick apart and realize was actually of importance as the season progressed. (It’s also a good way of showing that the writers are fully capable of engrossing the entire fan base and general audience in his and Mike’s story. Just knowing Will had painted something and that it was for Mike created this sense of PLEASE TELL ME WHAT IT IS AND WJATS GOING ON and whatnot that watchers are simply so susceptible to it’s insane.)

Okay, back to the van scene. Will’s confession.

Now, I’m not saying that the writers intentionally used this foreshadowing tool for us to find and understand immediately. There are plenty, plenty of instances where writers use Chekhov’s gun principle and it flies over peoples heads purposefully. What I’m trying to say is that, thematically and narratively, they would never have introduced Wills feelings for Mike if not for it to have importance to the story, or for nothing to happen with it at all. It’s a set up. And a maddeningly good one, at that. Because queer stories already do tend to fly over people’s heads, and also because there’s the added drama between Mike and Eleven that makes it seem quite impossible for any of these feelings to be addressed in the midst of such emotional chaos. But whatever. I think I’m rambling.

Basically, whether they end up together or not, whether Mike reciprocates these feelings, Will is forever established to be in love with Mike. The confession was simply too grand and emotional and earnest for him to just switch up abruptly next season when he meets someone new that he might have a better chance with. Even if there were to be a whole new arc for him where he learns to let go of Mike or something crappy like that, it would be terrible writing on their end and poor use of a well-set-up Chekhov’s gun reference. It would be like introducing the gun in the display case in scene one, then two scenes later just tucking it away into a storage closet for the remainder of the story. Like… what?

And plus, it’s HIGHLY unlikely that Will would end up with that sort of storyline next season when he’s literally WITH Mike for presumably a majority of the time (based on the set pics so far).

So that’s my debunking of the Chance rumors :) and I didn’t even get to mention how incompatible they’d be just naturally as characters. Chance, a Jason-following jock that hates Dungeons and Dragons, fantasy and nerdy things, and willingly assisted in beating up the Hellfire Club when they were trying to find Eddie. What about that at all screams Will’s type? And if you’re thinking “unconventional couple enemies to lovers”, just don’t. This isn’t a rom-com, especially for a queer plot line lol. I think it’s safe to say there’s no “chance”😉 that they will ever happen. And either way, it’d be a bummer if they did. Cus it would just be Will defeatedly settling for someone that isn’t Mike.

UGH! It makes me sad that the one thing that is firmly being teased by the writers (Will’s love playing a major role in the plot to come) is constantly being questioned and framed as different questions. “Will Mike reciprocate?” “Does this mean Mike and Eleven break up?” “Who will end up with who?” SHHH Frankly, to me this is already a win. It’s become obvious that Will having feelings for him will come up again soon, and the rest of the evidence that accounts for Mike’s end already speaks for itself, so I prefer to just sit back and watch it all unfold.

Again, thanks so much for the ask!! This was so fun to dissect and feel free to keep sending questions into my inbox. It might take me a second to post my response but I’m determined to get through all of them. Love you guys!! <3

[polutrope]

"Wherefore dost thou of the uncouth race of Men endure to upbraid a king of the Eldalië? Lo! in Palisor my life began years uncounted before the first of Men awoke. Get thee gone, O Úrin..."

'Turambar and the Foalóke' in The Book of Lost Tales Part II. Written c. 1919.

"How do ye of uncouth race dare to demand aught of me, Elu Thingol, Lord of Beleriand, whose life began by the waters of Cuiviénen years uncounted ere the fathers of the stunted people awoke?"

'Of the Ruin of Doriath', The Silmarillion, ed. Christopher Tolkien. Published 1977.

So I think something that gets left out of the Thingol discourse (note: no Thingol bashing on this post please), is the textual history of the chapter 'Of the Ruin of Doriath'. Most of the published Silmarillion very closely follows drafts written by Tolkien. Not so this chapter, which Tolkien only ever got to in his first draft of the Silmarillion in the historical summary tradition as we know and love it, i.e., the 1930 Qenta Noldorinwa, where he wrote:

Thingol ... scanted his promised reward for their labour; and bitter words grew between them, and there was battle in Thingol's halls.

(Consider that the Thingol of the Narn i hin Hurin, often cited as a gentler and more complex character, was written in the 1950s.)

The only other time he touched it in more expansive prose format was in the late 1910s, when Doriath was Artanor and Thingol was Tinwelint and the Silmarils barely mattered. He again mentions these events in brief annalistic form in the Tales of Years, most lately revised in the 1950s.

502 The Nauglamir is wrought of the treasure of Glaurung, and the Silmaril is hung thereon. Thingol quarrels with the Dwarves who had wrought for him the necklace.

That's it. That's all Christopher Tolkien and Guy Gavriel Kay (hired to help write this gap in the narrative) had to work with. So they took Tolkien's words where they could get them, and here you can see they took a speech Tinwelint (later Thingol, but not the same character as he developed) spoke to Úrin (later Húrin, but also not the same character) and adapted it to another context, i.e., Thingol's conflict with the Dwarves over the Nauglamir.

In The War of the Jewels (HoMe 11), Christopher writes a revealing commentary on how he put together this chapter, and expresses regrets on how it was done. He admits, "How [my father] would have treated Thingol's behaviour towards the Dwarves is impossible to say."

Now, I really dislike the 'Christopher did him dirty' line of thinking. Working through HoMe, it's obvious Christopher did the best, most faithful-to-JRRT job anyone could have done putting his father's drafts into a cohesive narrative. But, in this case, Christopher (and Guy Kay) did tinker with Thingol's character in a way that, I think, he regretted, or at least questioned. And, unfortunately, the way Thingol speaks to the Dwarves here -- a speech Tolkien did not write -- has become a huge sticking point in fandom conversations.

Yes, it's canon that Naugrim means "stunted folk" in Sindarin. There's definitely tension and mutual disdain between Elves and Dwarves, no question about it. Does Thingol call the Dwarves an "uncouth race" and claim superiority as a lord of Elves in the published Silmarillion? Yes, he does. And so yes, it's canon and it's part of Thingol's character. But it's not the only part of Thingol's character, which is the point I always see the (shall we say) appreciators of nuance returning to.

But I've wanted to make this post about the textual history of what I would consider Thingol's worst moment for a while, since I've not seen it included in the conversation before.

"Canon" in Tolkien's legendarium is hard to define, as we know. (Personally, that's precisely what makes it so creatively inspiring to me.) But I think there are some places where it's harder to define than others, and this episode with Thingol and the Dwarves is one of them.

Take it as you will.

[seeminglydark]

how much of his experiences with Caro does Johnny remember rn in SD? Is he getting them back at all?

Spoileryish stuff under the cut for his memories

TL;DR: Initially he remembered almost nothing about it. But now, he remembers that they were a cheerleader and they were friends and he had feelings for them. He remembers the supernatural things. He remembers Caros family was horrible and he wanted to help them, and that he couldnt. He doesnt remember finer details. kisses or hand holding or that they dated. he knows these things because hes been told but the memories arent his right now. but things are coming back.

Long story long RIGHT now at this moment in SD, it still vague for him but he is slowly getting things back. He remembers a cheerleader (he makes reference to a 'cute little cheerleader' in the Creaky chapter that Caro confirms was in fact them.) PTSD, Trauma and brain damage from both abuse and actually physically dying for a short period all contribute to Johnny having a lot of blank spots and fuzzy details in his memories of childhood/teenagehood. He remembers Caro was his neighbor after he puts together that Caro and Carrie are the same person (which takes a bit longer for him since they look and sound a little different these days and his memory of them is distorted, he has no pictures or anything to remind him. There is a scene in Mil-Liminal where Maddie shows him a yearbook photo and at least the part that he knows them QUITE WELL comes crashing back.) He does not remember they did have a chance to become 'official,' and actually dated, it happened so close to his major injuries/brush with death, but he does know it happened at this point, cuz Caro's told him. Things do come back to him, if he's reminded, for instance, Caro being trans now reminds him they told him about it once when they were kids, that it was something he knew about. Caro having their attack the night he hangs out with them reminds him they've ALWAYS experienced the supernatural. he falls into patterns with them that he did when he was younger, such as the way he sings to them or held them because of habit and familiarity even if he doesnt exactly remember. He's slowly putting the pieces back together as they are presented to him. i was asked while writing this reply if he has sense memory, and yes, caros scent, the feel of them, songs they liked together, if he ever gets into the Datsun again, all those things play into it. He does NOT remember the pendant Caro wears. Or that he gave it to them. Or that it was even his. When Caro speaks of him in the podcast, and he listens to it, he does not realize its him they are talking about. When they tell him it was about him, he actually still has a hard time believing that someone could speak about HIM in such a poetic and yearning way. Theres many things he remembers, and many things he knows because hes been told, but he does still have a hard time distinguishing which is which. I do want to note that there is inconsistencies in SD when it comes to these two, mostly because their relationship wasnt actually supposed to be canon, and Caro wasnt supposed to be in SD at all, its been a fun challenge to tie things back together with it, when i first started making the comic, I decided I'd leave room in my narratives for me to be creative and change up original concepts and even the way i draw if i wanted too as long as the Main Story was consistent, which helps keep things fun to create for me, especially for something ive been working on for 6 years! I'm actually touching on Johns memories in i think next months episode of SD, (it can be read early on Tapas's Early access with ink right now) so theres definitely more about it coming up <3

-RJ

[dvilkings]

how i would write and wish the rest of the bridgerton show would go (following the books but putting the spin onto things as the show has done): includes spoilers!!!

s3 p2 ~ colin and penelope

colin and penelope are engaged, announcing to her family and his. but eloise, upon finding out, forces pen to tell colin that she is lady whistledown. and she does with much nervous anticipation. maybe after she speaks with colin more about his own writing, encouraging him to publish his work. colin’s reaction to her being LW is angry of course — though not like he was when he said he would “ruin” lady whistledown's life upon finding out who the writer is. he is angry at pen for putting herself in danger of getting caught, and the backlash she will undoubtedly face if the ton finds her out.

this will lead into colin demanding pen retire. though she does not want to, for colin she would. she makes her last entry and calls it quits and continues on with her engagement to colin in a peaceful manner...

(this is where part of me wants a different outcome. that pen does not retire as LW and instead keeps writing, after convincing colin why she must, and his anger and jealousy turns to acceptance. i want this outcome a little more because it will keep the mystery of lady whistledown with the show for longer. and keeps a good narrative for the story to move -- and it would be so sad to not have julie andrew's wonderful voice taking us through regency london. the only downside i see to this is the rest of the seasons, which are notably not in the limelight of society and the eyes of the ton like the previous ones are. they are more on the outskirts and the quiet life of the regency era. and thus, LW would not be able to see much of the goings on for the rest of them. and besides, now that penelope will be married, and to the man of her dreams no less, she doesn't much have need for LW anymore. that comfort and wall will be replaced with colin and her future with him. so there are definitely pluses and minuses for each)

during this time, the queen will announce a bounty put on LW: whoever comes forth and exposes LW’s identity will receive a certain amount of money. this spurs cressida to make her announcement that she is LW, thinking the money could help her and her family so she is not forced into an arranged marriage with someone older who she will not like at all. except pen will not let cressida be known as LW and essentially take her work. so she posts her one last issue of exposing cressida, and then she is confronted in her home where cress explains how she knows pen is LW, and pen's slip up.

since finding out pen is LW, colin has been very tense with her, realizing that he is more jealous than anything, that she had a purpose for so long and her writing while gossip filled, was truly very good. and something he thought he could never live up to. but pen keeps insisting he is wonderful.

pen goes to colin, where he sets up his elaborate scheme with anthony, just like in the books, and announces to the entire ton that pen is LW at the last ball of the season, coincidentally, a masquerade ball. which is also where benedict meets the mysterious lady in silver, aka, sophie (opting not to use her last name in case it is changed due to any ethnicity changes the show (hopefully) makes for her), and he falls in love with her at first sight, having their private moment and kiss before she flees from the scene, most likely when colin makes his big announcement and uses it as a quick escape.

upon the ton accepting pen as LW is how s3 will close, leading to benophie's story for s4

s4 ~ benedict and sophie

time jump ~2 years into the future… benedict is stuck and fixated on his lady in silver, trying to find her after 2 years of searching, to no avail. not knowing her name, what she looks like as she was wearing a mask, knowing nothing about her but for her smile and mysteriousness and the raw need of needing her as his wife.

we will receive flashbacks throughout of sophie’s life with the cowpers, living with araminta as a mother and cressida as a sister. her biological father, lord cowper, not seeing her as anything more than a burden, and lady cowper suggesting she’d make a much better use as a mere servant. i believe at the end of s3/into the time jump, lord cowper will pass and araminta and cressida will be left with close to nothing, especially after cress' embarrassment after trying to announce herself as LW. she is a spinster at this point, something nobody ever thought would happen to her. but we see sophie and cressida as children, growing up as friends and the closest thing to sisters either will have (going off of cressida mentioning to eloise in s3p1 that she had a friend when she was young). but the cowper's dislike and disdain for sophie is clear from her childhood.

when the last ball of the season, the masquerade happens (s3ep8), the other servants helped sophie be able to attend for one night, but she is later on discovered by the cowper’s for her efforts and casted out. forced to find work wherever she can.

this lands her in a wealthy home as a servant. she meets benedict here when he attends a party at the home, where he saves her from the hands of her master’s son with filthy intents to touch her. and he takes her to the closest and safest place he can think of: the mondrichs, parents to the new and young lord kent.

they stay there with them for some time while sophie decides what to do with herself, where we see some of the mondrich's life and their son being raised to be the next lord kent as he is older now (early teenhood i believe?). benedict has no idea that sophie is his lady in silver, and sophie is beginning to fall in love despite her never being able to be with ben. and eventually, ben starts to feel the same, and while he wants to have her as his mistress, knowing she wouldn’t be a fit wife as she is a servant, and he still must marry a woman of proper lineage — she refuses, as she does not want to end up like her mother and have a child who would live just as she has. so he takes her to his mother’s new home (having moved out of the bridgerton house as kanthony have started their own family) as that is the only place he can take her where she will still be close to him — where she becomes a lady’s maid for the girls, eloise and hyacinth.

things follow closely here from the books for benophie. meanwhile, francesca has married john sometime during the time jump (presumably right after s3 ends, close behind polin) and travel between scotland and london. now we are introduced and see some of michael and his life and maybe longing for frannie. this season john most likely dies and we see the beginning of frannie and michael’s story start to unfold, both dealing with the heartbreaking loss. she finds she is pregnant with john's child, and thus the wait happens to find out if her child is a boy, and whether michael will become the new lord of kilmartin or not. but she has a miscarriage, and michael is to become the new lord of kilmartin. and frannie needs him in her time of mourning and strife, but he cannot see her and instead leaves for india, most likely because he had a recent discussion with kate about all the places to see and visit.

and with sophie living with violet and the girls, she grows close to them all, even eloise who has been writing letters mysteriously. sophie is the one to notice this and inquire more about it but eloise is still stubborn and tight lipped.

some time goes by until sophie is spending time with kanthony's children who are visiting violet's home and hyacinth, leading to the scene with her wearing a cloth to cover her eyes and leaving only her mouth exposed. benedict walks in and immediately knows that sophie is his lady in silver. they discuss, they argue, sophie reveals who she is and how she is the illegitimate daughter of the late lord cowper. and she runs away. right into lady cowper discovering sophie is working for the bridgertons and she schemes to get sophie thrown in jail for stealing immediately. which leads then to benedict and violet saving her from being hanged, even cressida becoming involved (sophie was her very first friend, and close to a sister, her character being a perfect mixture of rosamund and posy from the books). and benedict announces their engagement, unbeknownst to anyone, even sophie, right there.

upon finding out ben is now engaged, and the recent letter from phillip (her mysterious letter writing receiver) that she has still yet to respond to, she decides to run away to him, to see if she too could find happiness as half of her siblings have found thus far.

the season ends with sophie and ben engaged and planning to live in the country where it is quiet and out of society's prying eyes, frannie being a widow and losing her unborn baby while michael has offed to india, and eloise running away to sir phillip crane.

s5 ~ eloise and phillip

marina crane has died a year or two earlier (while she thought her life could be full of happiness and contentment with her children, she did not find it to be good enough to keep on going), and her children are older now, but phillip does not know how to act as their father as they are out of control and he did not have good parentage growing up. he has been writing back and forth with eloise bridgerton for some time since his wife’s death and he would like to meet her in hopes she will be a good wife and mother to his children, something he is desperate for. and then eloise shows up without notice.

they discuss, and go on as planned, where they can see if each of them will make an acceptable spouse. both finding the other to be not quite what they imagined after a year or two of corresponding. the children do not want eloise there, and in fact continue to lay traps and prank her in hope to make her want to leave - though she is not deterred. and after a particularly nasty prank that leaves eloise harmed, things change from there between all of them.

her family still has no idea where she is, even after many days away. but it doesn't matter to eloise, because during her stay with phillip and his children, she is growing attached and she believes she could be falling in love with them all. but one night post the accident of the children causing her harm, ending up with a bruise on her face, all of her brothers appear one night to confront the situation and phillip, questioning what has been happening. and though nothing that would warrant scandal, it will still come upon them since eloise ran away, without a word and without a chaperone (despite her being a spinster) and thus leads to a proper courting. eloise is taken to stay with benedict and sophie, living not too far away out in the country and phillip goes back and forth to court her every day as such is proper, while they are chaperoned by eloise's family.

we also see some of francesca living with being a widow, and missing john more than anything. her struggle with wanting a child but not being ready to find a new husband. and missing michael since he has left to india with a list of places to visit from kate. she is still lady kilmartin while michael is away, and taking care of the estate in scotland, which keeps her mind and body busy enough to not stop and think about her grief for too long during the day. and hyacinth is now out in society still, on her first or second year out and while she is from the bridgerton clan (notorious for their attractiveness and looks and popularity), her prospects dwindle due to her "un-lady like" personality that seems to scare off any man. seeing her try to navigate the marriage mart differently than her sisters, with her mischeviousness and stubbornness and unable to stop talking and picking arguments. then seeing a little bit of gregory as an eligible bachelor now, still young and nowhere near wanting a bride, but wanting to find a purpose for himself like all his siblings have seemed to have done. and also seeing a glimpse into kanthony's marriage family life. kanthony as the viscount and viscountess with their children, maybe one or two by this point. and hopefully some sight into daphne and simon (hopefully have recasting simon by this point, sad to say) and their numerous children. hopefully polin will have a child by now, or at least pregnant.

when eloise runs away to benophie's home after one of her fights with phillip, instead of their son getting sick, i believe it will be sophie, in the middle of her being pregnant - benedict is distraught and when phillip shows up to find eloise, seeing a tenderhearted moment of his understanding on the fear of losing a wife and child all in one. and later phillip explains to eloise how marina died in fact compared to the story they were telling the public, and how they will get married. that eloise is not leaving, contradictory to phillip's fears. they find their way into loving each other as they continue to court more, with the chaperone of anthony, and their dynamic as a family - how eloise comes to love phillip's children despite them not being his, and not being hers. and how they decide to navigate parenthood together, promising that they are not their parents or the ones that came before them, and will be better.

[this is where my thoughts will become shorter just because we don't have much build up from the show, aka the supporting characters and what not, so my thoughts will most likely be just as they are in the books, hoping the show will try to stick closely to them]

s6 ~ francesca and michael

michael decides to return to london after some years in india. and francesca has decided to rejoin society, end her mourning, and find a new husband so she may have children of her own. and while michael did run away after becoming the new lord of kilmartin, and needing space from francesca, he is still very much in love with her, unbeknownst to her. but we see more of this, of the heartache he has put himself through over the years. watching his cousin and the woman he loves be happy together, and then the one thing that was keeping him from her happened, and he couldn't let himself take that happiness.

watching frannie and michael reunite, and try to find their friendship again, to michael learning frannie wants children and will be looking for a husband this season, to frannie seeing michael as more than just the friend/cousin he once was to her when john was still alive, to michael making frannie jealous with his numerable admirers.

more people start to notice michael's feelings for frannie, most notably violet and colin (surprisingly). and even seeing their new closeness. as frannie frequently visits michael's home to care for him and his malaria he contracted in india. their relationship becomes more than friendship as francesca battles with her feelings towards michael and not knowing what to do with them. and after finally giving in to their desires, francesca flees back to scotland in the middle of the season. leaving michael confused and unknowing of what to do. colin is the one to spur him into action, telling him it is better to try for his happiness than to not, just as he had with penelope. i can imagine even violet will mention such the same to frannie as well, violet finding another happiness in marcus anderson, lady danbury's brother. that it is okay for frannie to go after her own happiness in someone else, that she can still honor her late husband, and live for him even after he is gone.

and so michael pursues frannie, running after her to scotland. accepting that john would have wanted him to be happy, even if it was with frannie. and francesca continues to battle with herself over her feelings for michael. and after finding her in the kilmartin estate, confronting one another, and asking frannie to marry him, her not knowing an answer, to getting stuck walking through the hillsides in the rain, fleeing to the land's caretakers old home, sleeping together again - michael almost wanting to prove to frannie she could get pregnant after her insecurities that she could not. to frannie speaking with john's grave and accepting that this is what john would have wanted for her too.

and so she says yes to michael, she will marry him.

the rest of the married bridgertons have started their families, found happiness with their spouses, something that drove francesca into jealousy because why not her. (i don't have much idea to what the lives of the supporting characters and other bridgertons will look like at this point as we don't see much of them in the books and the timeline is all off now, so this is what i have thus far) :

violet will have found happiness with marcus (i hope so at least)

kanthony will have several children by now, and have long completely taken over the bridgerton name and kate becoming a wonderful viscountess. anthony is proving to be an excellent father, something he seemed to have been born to do, showing so with his siblings in earlier seasons

daphne and simon are still happy and with several children of their own

polin are as in love as ever, with a child or two now, having spent some of their early life traveling together. and colin having a book published and working on more.

benophie are happy in the country, living the quiet life with a child or two, living close to

philloise and keeping a good friendship between their families, as eloise and sophie grew close when she was el's lady's maid. and their children while years apart, grow up together as friends as well.

[hyacinth's story will follow and then gregory's, though i have yet to finish hyacinth's story and have not started gregory's. i will update the thread once i have done so!!!]

s7 ~ hyacinth and gareth

tbd

s8 ~ gregory and lucy

tbd

[justanotherwriter140]

Kung Fu Panda 4 - The Movie

The last really, really long discussion post (for now).

Major spoilers ahead!

This review is full of spoilers, so please refrain from reading through it until you've watched KFP4. I would highly suggest doing so, as I want everyone to form their own opinions without my influence. The movie has its flaws (some of which admittedly being a bit distracting), but it's a fun film that has things to offer.

Kung Fu Panda 4 is a fun movie (take that as you will) that takes its audience on an action-packed, surprisingly funny, yet relatively contained adventure on which Po doesn't really do much. It's an inconsequential, safe sequel that doesn't really hurt the franchise but adds close to nothing.

I had a good time watching the movie. It was obviously produced with its theater experience in mind and the action scenes especially reflected that priority. The humor was actually funny sometimes and I enjoyed Po and Zhen's dynamic. During the film, I was able to put most (most!) of my grievances aside and take the movie for what it is. I've discovered that the best way to watch KFP4 is with low expectations and an open mind.

I have a lot of things to say about KFP4, both complaints and compliments (though the former might be taking the forefront in this review), and I hope this review can help those of you who have seen the movie organize your thoughts. I've been having a lot of trouble with that specific aspect of things myself. Those who get it get it.

With that said, let's get into my full review of KFP4! I've been waiting for nearly 2 years to write this and I'm so excited to share every single thought.

I'm going to follow the format of my first discussion post and curate a bulleted list of my thoughts, followed by an analysis of each of these points. Keep in mind that everything I say is IMO and this is more of a rant post than anything else.

Here are my main points:

The Furious Five's role is comically minuscule in the context of the film. Their actions are inconsequential and add nothing to the plot (a confirmed last-minute add), and they have 30~ seconds of screen time. Shifu is also largely irrelevant.

Mr. Ping and Li's presence has little to no effect on the movie (though I won't complain too much because they were pretty fun to watch and this movie has bigger problems). In almost any scenario, I am adamantly against having characters present that don't add anything to the narrative; however, Mr. Ping is an exception. I love Mr. Ping. James Hong is a gem.

Zhen's screen time is not utilized well and her character is underdeveloped. She definitely wasn't annoying, but I didn't find her either compelling or funny enough to warrant the screen time she was given, especially considering it wasn't used to establish a backstory/strong motives. This makes me feel bad for the character because the movie kind of screwed her out of any substantial development.

The Chameleon, while complimented greatly by Viola Davis, is an underwhelming villain. Viola Davis is amazing in this film and I would suggest watching it for her performance if for nothing else, but the Chameleon is underwhelming considering the super cool concept behind the character.

The film feels very rushed. Apologies to those who disagree, but I think the pacing is atrocious and the final fight is anticlimactic. The movie felt like a word-vomit with no discernible intermissions that stops abruptly when the film ends.

I felt as though Po didn't change/grow as a person and the audience never had a chance to either bond with or relate to his character. His internal struggle is kept to a minimum and we don't spend a moment alone with him as an audience, which is disorienting and distracting. Watching the film felt like running into an old friend at the store who's too in a rush to have a real conversation.

The action scenes were strong with few exceptions. Creative art direction was utilized and I thought the martial arts choreography was entertaining and dynamic. I love the color palette of the film and many scenes were very impressive visually.

With my main points established, I do believe it's ranting time. Strap in, folks.

Let's start strong with the Furious Five: I'm gutted. Chagrined, despondent, crestfallen, etc.

The lack of the Furious Five negatively affects KFP4 so much, because not only does their absence hurt the atmospheric integrity of KFP as a franchise, it also forces KFP4 to bring in a slew of different characters—all while still noncommittally including the FF at the very end because I believe the marketing team required it—that clog up the cast a bit. It all goes to show how important strong, established side characters are.

The Furious Five are side characters, but the role of "side character" does not equate to being irrelevant, expendable, or exchangeable. I recognize that the Furious Five aren't super developed as characters beyond a handful of lines that allude to traits sprinkled sparingly among the members; however, I believe that the tiny bits of development we have been given have proved impactful in the past. Tigress's development in KFP2 is a prime example of how much narratively conscious changes (however small they may be) can positively affect these movies.

Because of limited runtimes, the Furious Five often operate as more of a singular unit than five individuals. Even so, I don't think discarding them is valid. They're so important to the KFP universe (to Po's universe!) and not having them with him feels so wrong. The Furious Five are fully integral to the heart of Kung Fu Panda, which is why I believe a lot of those who have seen the new movie have expressed something feeling "off" or something being missing.

I agree with this sentiment. To me, KFP4 didn't feel like a KFP movie. I don't need a Furious Five spin-off movie and I can be fully content with a KFP5 centered around Po's journey as an individual as was intended from the beginning, but he can't carry an entire movie on his back. As strong as he is in every sense of the word, he is only one character. He's the centerpiece of the franchise, but a centerpiece can only go so far without the rest of the design, so to speak.

For me, the Furious Five's absence is one of this film's biggest faults. It's huge and glaring. I know I'm not the only one who feels this way, either, because the friends with whom I saw the film refused to talk about any other aspect of the movie after seeing it. Seeing them at the end was better than nothing, of course, but it was a disappointing culmination after eight years of waiting.

That all is to say I feel robbed. Despite all of this, though, I understand that there were reasons why the Furious Five weren't included in the movie. I don't believe the production team would exclude the Furious Five unless they weren't given a choice.

Shifu and Po's dynamic continues to be thoroughly delightful but their interactions are short and simplified. I would have loved to see more of them in this film, especially considering the extreme relevance of teacher-student relationships in KFP4. I (somewhat) digress, though, because the idea of Shifu having to live at the Jade Palace with only Po for an extended period of time is hilarious enough on its own. Maybe that's what the short film is about!

The comedy is odd but has some jokes that stand out. Po maintains a healthy relationship with his inner sass, which I think makes him more fun to watch and kind of eradicates the man-child verdict. Some jokes don't land, of course, but I genuinely thought KFP4 had some funny moments. Mr. Ping was consistently awesome and Po had some good lines sprinkled throughout the film.

As for Mr. Ping, he and Li Shan are the subjects of the film's B-plot as they follow Po to Juniper City out of shared concern for their son's safety. In my mind, they don't add anything to the story that couldn't have been brought about by other characters, but they had their moments of being entertaining. I enjoyed their silliness and thought they had a cute dynamic if nothing else.

Speaking of other characters, I want to discuss KFP4's deuteragonist and why I genuinely feel bad about the way her character was treated.

I want to let it be known that I'm still not on board with Po passing the Dragon Warrior torch to another character. While I agree that his arc is now calling for him to have a student, I disagree with the notion of him retiring from his DW role.

As I stated in my first discussion post:

Didn’t the initial significance and nuance of the title come from the fact that there is only one person who can be the Dragon Warrior, because the concept of the “Dragon Warrior” isn’t so much a title as it is Po himself? The universe (Oogway) must choose the Dragon Warrior because they are a singular being of legend. It is one person, and that person is Po. Wasn’t the point of the first film that the title ultimately doesn’t really matter because there is no “secret ingredient,” so to speak? The title doesn’t actually give Po anything. “It’s just you,” Po says, and that was the resolution.

When it comes to Zhen as a character, contrary to what I predicted I would think of her, I thought she was okay. While I was still a bit distracted by how out-of-place her design looks, I wasn't truly annoyed by her at any point and she and Po had some cute moments. Even so, I think their relationship could have been a bit more refined and developed.

While it's evident that Po and Zhen are meant to have a teacher-student/mentor-apprentice dynamic, I think their relationship feels half-baked. There were parallels that contradicted one another and ended up being confusing come the film's conclusion, and the nature of their relationship seems to vacillate depending on the scene. Additionally, the strength of their bond goes from zero to one hundred within thirty-ish minutes and left me with a bit of whiplash.

We're shown that Po and Zhen care about one another, but we're never shown why. They have a brief conversation during which they bond over being orphans, and Zhen says at one point, "You're actually a good guy," but that's it. This obvious lack of development is a bit disorienting because we're later led to believe that Zhen and Po care very deeply for one another when there's almost nothing to back it up.

A scene that sticks out to me when discussing this is when Zhen attack-hugs Po in a way that explicitly mirrors Tigress's hug from KFP2. This happens around the beginning of the third act, and while it had the potential to be an endearing moment, I think it fell flat.

The impact of Tigress's hug was brought on by her character's hardcore nature and reputation of being heartless, further strengthened with the knowledge that she was hugging Po (which was obviously way outside her comfort zone) as a show of companionship and fundamental understanding. Tigress hugged Po because he needed someone to recognize his strive for closure.

Zhen's hug had little to no impact because she had no reason to do it and it didn't indicate growth. She hugs Po because she's sorry for betraying him and doesn't want him to be killed by the Chameleon, but neither of these things are newly-established via this hug; we have already gathered by now that Zhen regrets betraying Po and doesn't want him to get hurt.

The hug is far from the movie's weakest point, but I think it's unnecessary given the context. I'm big on hugs in movies (an underutilized form of platonic affection, in my opinion), but it didn't fit here. I don't hate it, and I see it as an honest effort to bring emotionality to Po and Zhen's relationship, but it seems arbitrary.

Zhen and Po's relationship has a lot of potential and I'd be open to seeing more of them in the future, but I think some more thoughtful development needs to occur before I can humor it further. Even so, I can see myself featuring Zhen in some future post-KFP4 one-shots—sparingly, of course, because we have a lot of Furious Five content to compensate for.

Overall, they had a cute dynamic and some sweet moments but I'm not attached. I'm on board with Po having a student but I think their relationship needs a lot more development, something that this film unfortunately didn't give them time to either accomplish or earn.

Now, onto the Chameleon!

The concept of the Chameleon's character is admittedly super interesting. She's the deuteragonist's fastidious mother figure who feels that Zhen owes her a debt and as a result holds her to an impossible standard. That dynamic had the potential to be so interesting but I didn't think it was explored at all. There is no indication of Zhen having any internal conflict about fighting the Chameleon, no emotional complexity between them at all; it's disappointing because I think it would've added a bit of earnestness to the film.

Additionally, the idea of a shape-shifting villain is versatile. A shape-shifting villain gives those telling the story a lot of room to experiment with the protagonist and different ways in which the main character can be challenged and tested. It's yet another good idea utilized poorly. Just one idea: the Chameleon could have disguised herself as one (or several) of Po's family, friends, etc. and brought to fruition a new arc with his character (seeing as he arguably doesn't have one in this film), but she only disguises herself as Zhen very briefly in the movie.

Furthermore, the Chameleon completely relies on the powers of previous villains to pose any sort of threat to the main characters. She summons Po's former nemeses from the Spirit Realm (despite there being little logic in doing so considering Kai's literal evisceration) and takes their kung fu abilities for herself.

An excerpt from my first KFP4 discussion post that I think is relevant to the point I'm trying to make:

I don’t think it would be in the best interest of anyone if the past villains were to come back in any way that’s not a flashback (even then, I’m not sure I’d see the point). In all honesty, I thought that the whole point of the villains was that they died and stayed dead. They were defeated by Po once and for all as a testament to the idea of establishing Po's character growth and journey as a person through the bad things he’s able to overcome. It’d be highly contradictory to the messages of the other films if these villains were to suddenly come back.

While there was an honest effort made to portray the Chameleon as intimidating, I never felt as though any of the characters were endangered by either her or her army of lizard henchman. She's a visually appealing character (aside from her eyes, which I thought more resembled those of a gecko than a chameleon) and I greatly enjoyed Davis's performance, but overall I don't see the Chameleon as a notable villain.

The return of Tai Lung (had he been on his own) had the makings to be an excellent story, especially considering the importance of teacher-student dynamics in KFP4. To see him interacting with Shifu would have been incredible and could have led to further closure on Tai Lung's end (because I think that's kind of what the team was going for anyway), but it didn't happen.

It was nice to see Ian McShane reprise his role, but I wish Tai Lung's characterization had been more reminiscent of the way he was in the first film and more complimentary of his overall character arc. Tai Lung isn't a one-dimensional villain with a singular goal and motivation, and I couldn't help but feel as though the complexity of his character was simplified for the sake of KFP4's narrative.

Tai Lung's presence in KFP4 may be odd, but Shen and Kai's appearances are even more so. Kai, if I remember correctly, was fully obliterated by Po, reduced to literal particles on screen (which is kind of wild now that I think about it). Shen being in the Spirit Realm makes sense all things considered; however, Po and Li had no visible reaction to his presence, which seemed a bit unlikely considering Shen's deeds. This plot hole can likely be attributed to the fact that Shen and Kai's cameos (to my knowledge) were last-minute additions to the movie.

I have to talk about the pacing. I have to. I'm sorry, bear with me.

To me, the film's pacing is erratic and disconcerting. While I can appreciate a quick-moving narrative that doesn't dawdle on storylines that aren't interesting/important, KFP4 kind of flings itself too far in the opposite direction and ends up being frighteningly fast-paced. Once the credits began, I felt like I had been holding my breath for the entire movie.

KFP4 is confusing because while the runtime is standard for a KFP movie, it feels incredibly short. At the same time, the film's story moves at a breakneck speed and leaves little time for heart and development. These things culminate into a barreling boulder of a movie that simply doesn't have time to let its characters, story, or audience take a breath.

A fast pace is not inherently negative, but I don't think it worked in the favor of KFP4. The KFP franchise has always been very emotionally grounded (and just very grounded in general), so to see a film in which emotion/heart takes an aggressive backseat in comparison to action and comedy is jarring. While I think it's unreasonable for fans to expect the same emotional integrity as the original films to be present in the current and upcoming ones, I still think there's room for Po to grow and I felt as though the notion of him developing further was brushed aside in this film.

As for Po's growth, I felt it was nearly nonexistent. The previous trilogy wrapped up his character's journey beautifully and I know that KFP4 was bound to struggle with this particular aspect of making another KFP film; however, just because the strongest pillars of Po's character are established doesn't serve as a valid excuse to reverse his development and repeat what he learned in KFP3.

In KFP3, Po learned firsthand that he is capable of spreading wisdom and teaching kung fu. He also learns that he is constantly growing and that change is inevitable; there is always something more to learn.

"If you only do what you can do, you will never be more than you are now."

"I don't want to be anything more, I like who I am!"

In KFP4, Po pushes against this narrative despite fully accepting it in KFP3, actively reversing crucial parts of his character development achieved in the latter. KFP3 was non-ambiguously about learning to cope with change and responsibility, and I can't help but feel like KFP4 is simply copying this message while not adding anything to it.

Additionally, I felt that KFP4's Po generally felt less personal than he has in the past. In every KFP movie up to the franchise's most recent addition, I felt very connected to Po as an audience member. I felt like I was truly seeing the world of KFP through his eyes. I consider this to be one of the franchise's most impressive feats; it's incredibly difficult to build a universe around a character without making the audience feel limited to one perspective and one part of the world.

With KFP4, I felt both limited and disconnected. The world didn't feel as vast and all-encompassing as it has in the past and Po didn't seem fully like himself. This could be me nitpicking (as I'm prone to do), but I can't recall a single moment in the movie in which Po was alone on screen. Scenes like these are crucial for me because I see them as a meet-cute between the character and the audience, a moment for us to cross the bridge into their world in a way that's silent and intuitive. These little bonding moments are absolutely integral to feeling connected to a character.

Po's dream sequence in the first KFP movie is one of the best examples of this. It presents his aspirations, alludes to his way of life up to the point of the movie, and showcases his personality. During Po's dream sequence, the audience is quite literally inside Po's mind; we're there with him, seeing what he sees, subsequently feeling what he feels. Po is a dreamer at heart and makes the audience feel like dreamers, too.

In KFP4, I felt like I little to no point of reference when it comes to how Po was feeling. I didn't feel immersed in him and his world.

I know I've been very "doom and gloom" throughout this post, which is an exhausting mindset for everyone involved. I want to end my critique with something positive because I think some praise is deserved. Let's just say the movie could have been a lot worse, the details of which I'm sure you're all well aware.

Congratulations, you've reached the end! Thank you so much to all of you who took the time to read this unnecessarily long and detailed review. As long as I help someone translate their conflicted feelings into coherent thoughts, I'll call it a win.

KFP4 has its flaws and there are a lot of aspects that I dislike, but the I greatly admire and respect the hard work put into the film by those of the crew who put their efforts forward and tried their best to make it work. This does not at all excuse my issues with the movie, but it's worth saying.

As for the future of the series, I only hope that the next installment is more considerate of the franchise's origins and why Po's story is being told in the first place. I fully believe that another sequel could be good (even great!), but only given a strong, passionate crew with a great understanding of the characters and world (and I wouldn't be averse to some previous directors returning, just to put it out there).

Thanks again to those who took the time to read this crazy excuse for a movie review. Feel free to either disagree with me or add things in the replies/reblogs, I'm always looking for more thoughts to think.

Until next time!

[amiya-shirou]

Spoilers about Miquella and Marika's DLC Lore

Hate how there's so much black and white perspective in the Elden Ring community, especially regarding Miquella and Marika. Sorry if this sounds too much like an aggressive rant, it's not really my intention

"Miquella did fucked up shit which clearly clashes with his previous lore about being kind and compassionate, SOTE has bad writing" even in the base game he was already said to be the most fearsome of the demigods and it was kinda implied that he made kindness his weapon as he knew well how to make others love him, perfectly consistent with Ansbach's speech

"Miquella is manipulative so obviously he never really cared about Malenia" with all the things he did for her? is it so hard to believe he truly cared about his twin sister for the sake of which he went so far as to find ways to protect her from an Outer God's influence? with Malenia seemingly knowing about Miquella's plan and everything?

"Radahn loved his horse and protected people so he was obviously a perfectly good gigachad who could never ever agree with Miquella" he was among the forces attacking Leyndell. his ideal was Godrey - a conqueror, and the first Elden Lord. having an obsession with battle and war certainly doesn't sound like someone who could never do anything wrong, no matter how honorable he might be in battle.

"Marika did a lot of bad things and was a tyrant so obviously she never held any real love for poor Messmer or even Godwin and all she cared about was power." she made blessings to help Messmer specifically, something unique enough it's specified she never did such a thing again. 2 of these are dropped by Tree Sentinels protecting her home village which she bathed with Grace and clearly held deep love for. She went to great lengths to help him with his curse when she could have just killed him or imprisoned him where he coulnd't be of harm like she did with the Omen twins. she smashed the Elden Ring, literally sacrificing her position as queen as that action put her against the Greater Will and resulted in her shackling, which definitely doesn't sound like someone who cares about power and herself alone. And about that, if she's been imprisoned ever since before the start of the game with no one knowing about it, why are most people so easily assuming she voluntarily abandoned and ignored Messmer? she physically couldn't contact him if she wanted to. Like, it's debatable, maybe she did abandon him since before the Shattering, but it definitely doesn't feel that obvious to me, and Messmer misinterpreting her disappearance feels more in tune with the FromSoft style tragedy

all this sounds like those who insisted that since Ranni caused the Shattering then of course she can only be evil and manipulative all the time and clearly holds no real affection for the Tarnished and is only manipulating us as well. Which I feel completely clashes with her questline, narrative and characterization.

Kind people can still do evil, especially if they don't fully realize how bad what they're doing is, or if they think they're making a necessary sacrifice. Cruel, fucked up people can still love, and love might be the very reason why they ended up being so cruel. This is something the whole game is built on, and even before Elden Ring, a constant of the Souls series has been about fighting tragic individuals who ended up in antagonistic positions despite their originally good intentions.

imho Marika and Miquella are both better, more complex character than they would have been otherwise, and leave more to discuss about the game's themes and narratives, specifically because they have multiple facets to them. The hated Queen of the Golden Order was originally a victim. Her kind son who tried to fix his family's wrongdoings discarded so much of himself and did so many things to achieve his dream of compassion that he ended up being just as wrong as his mother. Isn't this much more interesting than putting out an entire game-sized DLC just to say "manipulative evil queen girlboss truly didn't care about anything and just wanted power!!" and "Kindly Miquella is so perfect!!! this surely fits our 'nothing is perfect or eternal and everything is ambiguous' narrative"?

[tarotmundomonde]

The person on your mind March 2024

love reading (feelings & actions)

Let me know, if it resonates and what you think about this type of a reading!

pick a number 1-5 OR an emoji 💟 🐳 🦚 🕸️ 📒

(ps. this reading is for practice and for fun)

1.💟 Okay, gotta be honest with this pile. At first, when I did the reading step by step, it seemed like overall you are dealing with someone, who does have some feelings for you, but whom to someone else is coming first. Therefore it looked like this person was keeping you as a back-up plan and ghosts you rather than directly rejects you. However, once I pulled all the cards to the table, something was off. So that interpretation might be true to someone. However, after taking a second look at your spread, it seemed to be your narrative about the situation, not the actual truth. Like you think that the reason why someone is not talking to you is, because they are in love with someone else and that it's the obvious. That it's time for you to accept that, you think this story is over and it's time to release it. However, this narrative of yours is not theirs. Looking at the cards, the connection is on pause at the moment, dormant, but the light is not gone. The connection is very much alive, it's simply on time out. This person sees you and you see them. And this person adores you. But it looks like things are lost in translation, you've misunderstood each other. You started writing different stories and chapters on your connection. You think they are taken? They think you are taken. So this person has taken distance from this connection, perhaps trying to release it. But your connection has a really strong heartbeat to it, no kidding. And whatever happens, there is a new beginning on the horizon. Your person has feelings for you, but they feel that they cannot tell you about them. It pains them, the feeling that they can't talk to you nor express their feelings to you. And as the month of March goes by, it really looks like they are madly in love with you. And it hurts that they can't just grab you into their arms and kiss you like there is no tomorrow. Again, they feel they can't tell you. As for their actions, it does look like rejection for sure. It's like they refuse to communicate with you, to talk to you. But the thing is that what they are trying to say is that they have dignity. And they are trying to get their sh*t together and you should, too. But in no way the cards are implying them ending things with you successfully. It looks like they want to make a point by putting the connection on hold. Like they are saying, if you want them, then it's only you and them. Kinda like by putting your connection on pause, they want you to realize that they are the one you have a heart-based connection with. Because this person is very aware that there is something deeper there between you two, so they are waiting. They've made up their mind and they will not budge.

2.🐳 Looking at the cards, it looks like you are in the middle of some kind of healing process. This person could actually be a distraction. Maybe they tried to use you for healing, but it doesn't look like you are supposed to know that. Online interaction could be emphasized in this connection. But it feels like this connection is perhaps short-lived or has some frustrating aspects to it, some repetitive pattens to it. There is definitely active spying going on here and mind games. But the attraction is real. This person could be quite attractive. So you two can't help but be curious about each other, but there is also dissatisfaction and isolation. And a sense of comparison. This person compares you to others and things. Currently, it looks like their feelings are more on the friendzone side towards you. They might have experienced you as a third-party that they are working on releasing. Like they are detaching themselves from you. But still, they kinda want to be there, they want to be friendly towards you. And as the month of March goes by, they could feel a little sorry, like they can't help but disappoint you. It's like they are saying that it's a pity, but now they have to fully prioritize another connection. It's like in their heart they want to tell you that they simply cannot be with you, they can't give you love or a relationship. Maybe friends could be possible, but nothing more. As for their actions, it's very passive. It looks like a break-up. But they are still there. It's kinda like you can see them happy with someone else. But oddly, it's like this person is expecting you to wait on them and they are expecting to see you try connect with them. Their attitude is that either way they will be happy and the one doing great. So it does seem that you two are still "connected", but perhaps for some healing reasons, like you are learning a lesson. They are bringing you some sort of drama and challenges to you. This person truly feels in their power and they seem to know the power of their attraction, so they are literally swimming in it. And it seems their presence is supposed to activate you to find your power, like you are meant to experience empowerment. So that's what is coming through for you in this reading.

3.🦚 Looking at the cards, this looks like a genuinely romantic connection with a lot of physical chemistry and a spiritual connection. This could also be a rather new connection. But even if not, definitely there is a feeling of trying to solidify the connection, a sense of wanting to protect it and to make it grow. Perhaps you are looking forward to taking the next step in this connection, for example a first kiss. But there are obstacles here. Whether it's distance or some sort of illusion and confusion you are dealing with. This person feels like they get and can get so much from you. But in their heart, they also feel like this connection could have a future. They feel like they want to be your companion in life and have you as their companion. And as the month of March goes by, it looks like they really want to speak about something with you but don't want to be the first one to bring it up. So instead, they are trying to stay as patient as they can and just wait. As for their actions, it seems to match with their feelings for you. They seem to take a more strategic approach towards you. Trying to figure out your next moves and to see, how they should play their cards with you. This person wants to be seen by you, they want to shine, they want your full attention. There will be focus on communication, on socializing with you, whether it's hanging out, going on dates or just texting/calling. But this person definitely graves to have intimacy with you. However, they want to feel special, they want to feel worthy. So it seems they might be seeking validation from you or some proofs that they are important to you. Like the fun and intimacy is not enough, they want to feel irreplaceable. So things will not move that smoothly forward this month. This person wants you to know the unsaid, to read between the lines. Like they refuse to say or ask, what they want to hear and know from you. So in the end, it's like they are waiting on you, waiting for you to realize something and to bring it up. This could be also simply them saying pick me to you.

4.🕸️ Looking at the cards, someone in this connection is all about the self-interest. They are in it for the benefits. It looks like someone here is looking for the right moment to make a move. Something about commitment or making a proposal. Also, delusion. Oh wow, so there is another woman, who entered the picture and she is like a wild fire in their heart. If they ever had any feelings for you, they are all gone. And as the month of March goes by, it looks like just like the wild fire came in, it's gone. Suddenly, it's over and they are in their blues. And that's when in their heart they feel like coming back to you feels right. Because they feel like you would welcome them back and that in your arms they would heal and feel safe and better. They seem to feel like you are a safe space, homey and comfortable and familiar. As for their actions, this person is extremely self-confident, whether it shows or not. They are certain you've been waiting for them. So it seems they plan to simply re-appear, as if nothing ever happened. And they'll come to get what they need from you. This person is more perseverant than you'd think and they know they are 100% sure that if they just wait, triumph is theirs. This person is like they know you don't want to be without them and that their presence is important to you and they know you want to see them. So it seems like they might try to come in and offer some kind of a more firm foundation to you. But remember, it's all about their self-interest, about what's in it for them. And this person believes you are obsessed with them and that's where their confidence about you stems from.

5.📒 Looking at the cards, maybe one of you or both are students or there is emphasis on studies or work. Something seems to be hindering the connection this month. Perhaps some limitations and complications, for example time constraints or business trips or being at a distance, etc. Otherwise, it seems the connection in itself is quite healthy and prospering. Indeed, it looks like your person doesn't have time for love. They seem to be so preoccupied with other things. They feel a bit conflicted towards you, because they feel like they don't have the time to see you nor talk to you. Yet, they want to do well with you but they can't. So, it's difficult for them. And as the month of March goes by, this person really wants to approach you but feels a little intimidated. They want to learn more about you, they want to get to know you better. But they may feel like they need some encouragement from your side. As for their actions, this person really wants to be honest with you. They seem to have some concerns and fears, perhaps they feel a little trapped. But they would like you to take the lead and that you show them actively attention. This person really wants your attention and support. It feels like they do want to give you hope so that you wouldn't stop being into them and wouldn't stop showing them interest. This person does want to see your connection develop further. So this could be a bit of a test from their side towards you as well. To see, how much you truly are into them. And if the conclusion is they are sure about you, then it seems they do want to take the next step towards you.

[starlostlix]

Moriarty the Patriot - Sherlock, William, uncertainty and control:

(aka me writing a lot about something i find a bit interesting)

I think what I find most interesting about Sherlock and Liam as a duo (platonic or romantic idrc in this context) is how Liam's ways of controlling Sherlock in his plans differs from the ways he controls others. Whilst people like Bonde and Moran are allowed to improvise as long as his goal is achieved, Liam lets Sherlock choose between a limited amount of ways where he still doesn't completely understand the goal behind the situation. Liam seems to think that it's not completely possible to actually control Sherlock the way others are and has to change his approach. In fact, Sherlock as a person opens Liam up to the idea that not everything can or needs to be controlled or certain.

The first meeting with Sherlock is pure chance. Liam had no knowledge of Sherlock's existence until they bumped into each other on the Noahtic. They randomly strike up conversation by the pure coincidence of being in the same place at the same time. Liam in his letter states that this was entertaining enough for him to forget about his plan (something which is usually a constant in his mind), even considering abandoning it to continue mystery solving with Sherlock as they got to know each other more. All this from a chance encounter, something which Liam doesn't usually have room for in his plans. It opens him up to things, in this case a person, out of his control for the first time in the series as far as we can tell - and he enjoys it.

This leads to the addition of Sherlock into the Moriarty Plan, an unexpected but helpful asset in exposing the misdeeds of the nobility to the people. Liam sometimes describes Sherlock as the main character of the performance, which is significant in terms of their dynamic. With Liam as the director, Sherlock's narrative is technically under his control - so Sherlock is consistently put in situations where he has the power to act in a limited number of ways as per this narrative. This frustrates Sherlock greatly, as he seems to value being in control of the mysteries but now the mystery has control over him. He also knows he's being toyed by someone with more control of the events he's in. However, the control Liam has isn't absolute. Liam gives Sherlock many times to have the answer to the mystery handed to him, which Sherlock denies due to his mentality of wanting to solve the mystery himself. To me this shows that Sherlock is the one that has the choice over continuing the chase (and therefore the entire act) at all. If he'd accepted the answer from Hope or Alder, Liam's entire plotting would have to be rewritten. Sherlock overestimates the control Liam has over him, and Liam knows that he cannot control what Sherlock does completely (but can put restrictions on his options).

This dynamic is especially seen in The Riot at New Scotland Yard, where Sherlock specifically acknowledges that the way he acts could disrupt the Lord of Crime's plans, and is frustrated about his lack of control here. But the fact that Sherlock technically had the power to possibly disrupt Liam's plans at all in Scotland Yard shows that Sherlock has an element of free will in his situations.

In The Two Criminals (im going anime only from here since i haven't got all the way through the manga yet) is the next time we see something that Liam did not control for - Sherlock's act of murdering Milverton. Sherlock may have murdered Milverton to save Watson's marriage, but it seems to be also in part to prove to Liam that he cannot be completely controlled. This is when it occurs to Liam that, in his mind, Sherlock is definitely going to kill him and he plans for just that.

Liam's letter to Sherlock is a goodbye at its core. He plans to have Sherlock at his side in his final moments and thinks that despite their friendship Sherlock will stand by. But by now Liam feels that his control is fading - not only over his people, but his sins. The only thing he requests in that letter (which are the only things he wants to control for) are Sherlock helping others, and Sherlock being by his side to, in essence, pull the trigger and let him accept death.

Sherlock however has shown that Liam cannot control him before and does so again. On the bridge he perhaps does the thing that Liam expects the least - Sherlock tries to help him. In fact Liam is so appalled by the idea that he as the Lord of Crime is worth saving that he tries to regain control of the situation by starting a half-simulated fight. I say half-simulated since the fight is simulated by Liam to say that Sherlock defeated him after the event, but also is full of real tensions between the two. Sherlock is fighting for Liam to stay, Liam is fighting for Sherlock to give up on him and let him die (what he planned for almost his entire life).

Then, dangling above the river Thames, Sherlock pulls out the biggest surprise for Liam - Sherlock came to help because he's his friend. It's funny how Liam is accounted for all the people of London projecting their rage at him, but not for the fact that there may be one or two people that would want to spend time with him. He couldn't have planned for the genuine connection he and Sherlock had gained. He couldn't account for perhaps the most integral thing - a person that actually cares for him outside of his usual circle and wants him to have a happy life, despite everything he's done.

It isn't until he's falling that Liam realised Sherlock is truly an agent of chaos in his otherwise meticulous plan. He watched Sherlock jump to catch him, he views him strangely enough as a symbol of peace. Sometimes, chaos and unpredictablility can bring peace, something that had never accounted for can bring good.

By the time he wakes up in New York, Liam is in a state of uncertainty. No plans, no goals, his life is a 'blank'. It is Sherlock who convinces him that this uncertainty can be a good thing. He can 'paint that canvas however he likes' even if it takes some time. He can struggle to find his way, because the way him finds will still be right for him eventually. Uncertainty and a lack of control can create new opportunities and a new outlook on life. And Sherlock will be there to support him. No matter what he decides to do.

Sherlock represents the uncertainty of life for Liam and the good it can bring. He shows him that he doesn't need to plan everything, a lack of control can be a good thing, and that sometimes the best things can come from chance and uncertainty. They, as a duo, are an product of this uncertainty and lack of control.

(anyways can people tell that i kind of write essays/powerpoints on things i like for fun? this was going to be like one paragraph or two at first but then more details to explore came up. feel free to correct me if i've missed/misinterpreted anything in my writing! I'm still new to MTP - i watched the anime for the first time like 2 weeks ago and have read the first 9 manga volumes too, plus a few of the new york/time skip chapters - but this series has really taken over my life recently and that's not a bad thing)

[a-secret-bolton-vampire]

I finished arc 13 of Ward today. So far, arcs 9, 12, and 13 have been my absolute favourites. In finishing 13 it really hit me just how incredible this story is.

I was scared to read Ward at first, because I loved Worm so much and I wasn't sure how it could top Worm. I was also scared because it hit a lot of personal trauma triggers and became very much worried that it wouldn't do justice with it. In my mind, the worst things that Ward could do was try to get Victoria to forgive her abusers, that her bio family is the most important and she should reconcile with her mother.

My best friend (my co-author for Mending Constellations, etherealDesign) sang the praises of Ward and I eventually decided to try it out. I expected that it would be almost or just about as good as Worm. I'm more than halfway done, and I know how the rest of the story goes, but I honest to god think Ward is even better.

Taylor as a protagonist rules, she's one of the best characters I've ever read and she is insanely compelling and her arc is so beautifully tragic that I can't help but watch that tragedy unfold in awe. There are some parts of her I relate to, such as the bullying, the feeling of being a sort of social outcast, an introvert who loves reading and learning. I also really love the way her morality is written and it's so unbelievably rare for a female character to be written that way.

But Victoria is far far far more relatable. So many takes on her are so shallow and missing the nuances within her. She's so different from Taylor and yet so similar they work perfectly as foils. Taylor didn't have a social support network but had a loving family. Victoria had a social support network but not a loving family. The writing for her PTSD is so insanely on point as someone with PTSD that it hurts to read at times. I'm so happy the narrative is not punishing Victoria for not wanting to forgive her family, especially her mother and Amy, for what they did to her. In so many stories, so many that it actually boggles my mind, family is the most important thing and something that can transcend any and all hurts. Makes that moment in arc 1 where Carol wants Amy and Vic to reconcile mean so much in that context. Sometimes, a hurt cannot be reconciled with, no matter how close you once were to the person who hurt you.

I feel people who haven't experienced familial abuse might not get how much Ward gets right about it. For sure, she has a complicated relationship with her parents still, it isn't pure hatred like it is for Amy, but there is no doubting that the relationship is strained, to put it mildly, with her parents. And also, very very very much happy that there is no attempt at rehabilitating Amy's image to downplay what she did to Victoria. This is not something you downplay and even if Amy is still (somehow) a sympathetic or even relatable antagonist, this is something that just cannot ever be forgotten or forgiven.

Also, Victoria reads as unbelievably transgender. She spends 2 years as the Wretch in the hospital, and in Ward her forcefield makes her visibly uncomfortable with herself and her body. And then her costume is literally a dysphoria hoodie... Her and Sveta especially are such great examples of transgender allegories (and in the case of Sveta she literally, canonically IS trans). And on top of the PTSD, the abuse, the gender dysphoria, all these things that make me relate to Victoria so heavily... then there is the very blatantly textual dissociative plurality. There is no way that Wildbow didn't intend for Victoria, the Warrior Monk, and the Scholar to be all different people in a plural system. Not even a doubt in my mind.

Oh, and this is JUST talking about Victoria! I could go on and on about how well Ward writes mental illness, including some really, really vilified mental disorders. Ashley is (at least likely from what I've gathered from the notes Dragon sent to Vic's laptop) bipolar and definitely a clinical narcissist, but it isn't vilified, and in fact she is heavily, heavily humanized. Even Cradle, someone I'd call as close to pure evil in Parahumans as you can get, has some really really phenomenal writing that shows that he could have lived a normal life as a functional person despite a lack of empathy or remorse.

In general, mental illness in media is important to me as someone who has a personality disorder, and being able to show people who are narcissists or have antisocial tendencies as ultimately just being people and not inherently dangerous is very, very big for me.

There's so much more I could say, but Ward is nothing like I was initially led to believe. It's miles better in every way than I could've hoped for, and it has quickly come the vector for some of the best and most relatable writing of trauma and mental illness I've ever seen in media.

Ward is a story first and foremost about trauma recovery. The fact it is in the backdrop of a literal post-apocalyptic setting is not accidental. It's the best way to frame a sequel to Worm in my mind.

[topazlight]

My feelings on Giegue's existence from, like... a Doylist / exegetic perspective are kinda complicated, honestly. I don't at all think that he's badly written or poorly-utilized, but I still can't help but feel that he and the aliens in general are underutilized.

Giegue has exactly two canon scenes of screentime in the official series, both of which are among its most striking and memorable moments. Neither of these scenes are poorly-written; far from it. They're both very well-written and compelling, with Beginnings' establishing his character and underlying inner conflict very well and EarthBound's achieving what it set out to do in terms of representing certain emotions Itoi experienced as a child while tracking in a downright heartbreaking way with what happens in EarthBound Beginnings despite EarthBound having almost nothing in the way of overt continuity with it. Hell, in Japan, EarthBound Beginnings literally built its tagline around that final boss fight! Giegue is definitely a very effective character as he is...

...but, I still feel very strongly that he had so much more to offer, story-wise, than what was actually put into the games. Itoi's masterful use of narrative "negative space" is a defining characteristic of the MOTHER trilogy's writing to me, so it's not like I think his entire life should have been exhaustively hashed out or anything, but I would really have liked to see and learn more of him, his people, and the other aliens working with them. The fact that someone (hi @otherhand42) literally made a whole fangame about exactly that (and it's certainly not the only fan creation interested in exploring Giegue more as a character!) is, I think, proof that there's a ton of un(officially)tapped potential there!

[sgiandubh]

Hi, I don't know if you understand me or go through this, I would like to know your feeling about it.

After all this circus (which I can't take anymore and after a few years in the fandom) I can't stand Caitríona anymore. I swear I try, I swear I try to get excited about her projects. I swear I try to understand her reasons, her anger, her antipathy towards us all these years. For a long time I managed to suppress this sad feeling I feel for her, but now it screams. I can not anymore.

On the other hand, I still support Sam, even more than I should, because he, along with her, plays the main role in the narrative and is not a saint. I think these feelings would be the signal to leave the ship. I no longer admire her, I no longer miss her, at least on social media, I no longer even want to see her face.

I feel bad for feeling this way, I don't know what to do. Have you ever felt like that? And before you start offending me, I'll tell you: I'm not anti, only or whatever. I am someone who paid a lot of attention to this narrative and ended up hurt, very hurt by them, by her specially…

Dear Feel Bad Anon,

I was just about to go to bed after a very, very long and dense day, but your question stopped me in my tracks. Story of my life, really: that banging on the dorm's door at midnight ('it's vile X, we just broke up, help') - ah, the memories. So, I will not let you down.

First of all, thank you for this ask. It is a genuine one, I know it. It takes a lot of honesty to write it down without cackle, hysteria and the everlasting 'they owe me' refrain (no, they don't owe anybody anything, because, Anon, do you owe anybody anything when you are that much in love? I am sure you don't give a hoot about Aunt Y and Neighbor Z, Anon, and fuck them and their curiosity, eh?). And, my goodness, you really do sound exhausted, here.

Take a good look at this pic I took in Mandalay (see post below) of a Yama Zatdaw (Ramayana) puppet show:

All these public ten years are summed up in here: the puppeteers (TPTB), the puppets (S&C) and the convenient prop ( T) in the middle.

Where are the private ten years? I could think of this Amarapura pic, taken the day after the puppet show:

And that is ok, Anon. It's them. Their lives. Their love. We are just peepers through a keyhole, in here: let's try and do it gracefully.

You don't like C anymore? S couldn't give a damn about how you feel, Anon, and forgive me if I sound brutal. He loves her and he already did the unthinkable for her. C does give a damn about you, however. Not because she cares about you, but because she probably thinks your intelligence and your questioning endanger her narrative and put at risk all the negotiated perks. This is why she thought intelligent to bark at you and publicly insult you: by a simple zealot reflex, her part of the bargain. It has nothing to do with her private truth. You are disappointed by a puppet, not the real C. Or, using this time Plato's Allegory of the Cave, you are mad at the silhouettes reflected on the walls of that cave, not at the people whose reflections you see - those people are outside the cave.

Get out of that mental cave, Anon. Stop racking your brains off trying to give definitive answers that cannot be honestly given with the amount of information we have. Stop obsessing about a visibly curated social media presence, online times and all this shit - they mean very little, especially at this point in time. Trust your heart and your intuition. Trust your life experience. Trust yourself, not me. All this side of the fandom can offer you is based on our own life paths and street smarts. Do I think it's legit? Of course, otherwise I'd not be here or I'd be a pervert. Do I think that together we'd be a step closer to what really is? Oh, by all means. But you are the only sovereign master of the course, here. You are the only one able to choose between believing or rejecting, staying on deck or jumping ship.

I chose to be interested in the puppeteers, Anon. The paper trail. The minute intricacies. The boring details Mordor does not want to see or doesn't know how to translate in simple English. That is really what keeps me going and that is something I will never publicly trade. The more I look into it, the clearer the picture is. Oh, for sure, I take great pleasure in seeing and discussing the script inconsistencies - don't we all? But to me and as I see it, this is the tip of the iceberg. The bar I set myself for public happenings, statements and all the shit show is very low. It avoids undue disappointment and even allows me to be relaxed about it. Not always. Not a perfect strategy. But it is my way of managing it and so far, it works.

Take at least a day off Tumblr. Think of it as detox. I can guarantee you will see it way clearer. I wish you well, Anon. And I really hope my long, long answer helped at least a little bit.